It Takes a Village

They say it takes a village to raise a child and I agree, wholeheartedly!!!

 

I have been fortunate to be "raised" by so many amazing women in my years!  My parents divorced when I was in elementary school and my mother moved from Indiana to Florida when I was in 6th grade.  I definitely needed women in my life to help me with "stuff"!

 

My dad had some girlfriends and other wives over the years, but only one really & truly brought meaning to my life, Judy.  Judy started to teach me to drive.  She and I joined a health club.  She showed me how to be both silly & generous when driving the highway and going through toll booths (this was back when there were actual people in the toll booths!!)!  She was light-hearted and carefree!

 

One of my dad's sisters would take me shopping for school clothes.  My Aunt Marla

 was quite the shopper, too!  She knew deals and helped outfit me with some nice clothes that saved my dad some cash!  A win-win for us both!!!  She would also give me many of her hand-me-downs, which were always name brands! 

 

When I "became a woman", as they say, my gifted & talented teacher, Mrs. Hanson, had to take me to the nurse.  The next day, she gave me a felt rose with a beautiful note welcoming me to this important change in my life.

 

Throughout most of high school, I lived with my aunt and uncle.  My Aunt Nita became a second mother to me.  She fed me, cleaned my clothes, gave me my own bedroom, helped me get ready for prom, threw us a small wedding reception and my college graduation party....among so many other things.  She introduced me to coffee.  We, along with another of my aunts, binged on Fannie Mae chocolates, just for the sheer lunacy of it!  She was there for me when we put my brother on a plane to live with my mom in Florida.  She was there for me when my dad was off doing his own thing.  She was there when I married Chris.  She was our place to go for every holiday, when we lived in northwest Indiana!!

 

My friend John's mom, Dolores, was a gem in my high school years, too.  Lucky for me, they lived just around the corner!  I almost lived with them, actually, before we moved in with the family.  She and I had private jokes and she just has the sweetest soul!  I love the whole Stillson clan, to include Dolores's sister, Dorothy!  Dolores is the epitome of what any girl would want for a mother-in-law!  (Ellen, John's wife, is one lucky gal!)

 

For many years, I was the youngest wherever I worked and at many places I was blessed with women who gave me advice and support, in a myriad of ways.

 

My grandma is incredible when I visit my family in Florida!  She makes my favorite cookies, no-bake chocolate!  She brings them to the airport, along with a sandwich and other goodies, for my car ride!  She will also send me back to the airport with provisions!  And she & my grandpa just take amazing care of feeding us when we are their guests!!

 

My uncle's wife, Betty, is the consummate hostess!  She was always at the ready when anyone dropped by and, when most of us still lived in Crown Point, theirs was the house to gather for any and all events!  Chris and I lived with Uncle Mark, Betty, Kyle & Matt for about 5 months when we returned from Florida in 2001 (just before we bought our house in Hobart) and Sundays were a day we all congregated for a meal.  Betty always turned it out!  It reminded me of the movie "Soul Food" where the extended family gathered on Sundays for a big meal at the grandma's home.  We began calling our Sunday meals "Big Betty's Soul Food for White People"!  Which also became the name of her personal cookbook!!!  Even after they moved, visiting their home was like staying at a B&B!  No lie!!!  I wish I had a tenth of her innate hostess abilities! 

 

Now, here I am, early 40's with years of life & work experience under my belt.  I feel it has become my time to return the graciousness and the wisdom shared so generously with me by the variety of goddesses brought into my life at certain times and for specific reasons.  The goddesses who taught me without necessarily knowing they were giving a lesson. 

 

Like today, my aunt and her husband (she is no longer married to my uncle) are arriving for a visit in Denver, to see her son, her granddaughter and us!  In advance, I helped her find a place to stay that wasn't a hotel.  Also, I know how hard travel days can be, so rather than waiting to take her to the grocery store, I bought a few staples (bread, PB&J) and shared some of ours (butter, water, ham from Sunday's Easter meal, eggs, mustard & mayo...and the chocolate mousse cake) for something to eat (that wasn't fast food!) the moment they got to their rental place.  This I learned, picked up, from the women in my life!!

 

May we all be the community who shares our gifts, teaching valuable lessons, even when we aren't aware we are doing it.  May we be The Village!